WINTER DREAMS

I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste. David Bissonette ********* When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. Sacha Gui try ********* After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. Hemant Joshi ********* By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. Socrates ********* Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them. Dumas ********* The great question.... Which I have not been able to answer... Is, "What does a woman want? Sigmund Freud ********* "I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years." Sam Kinison ********* "There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage." James Holt McGavran ********* "I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't." Patrick Murray ********* The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once... Anonymous ********* You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to. Henny Youngman ********* My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met. Rodney Dangerfield ********* A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong. Milton Berle ********* Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy. Anonymous ********* First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!" Second Guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive." Anonymous

"There is a garden in every childhood, an enchanted place where colors are brighter, the air softer, and the morning more fragrant than ever again." " For most of us, dreams come true only after they do not matter, Only in childhood do we ever have the chance of making dreams come true when they mean everything."

"We plan our lives according to a dream that came to us in our childhood, and we find that life alters our plans. And yet, at the end, from a rare height, we also see that our dream was our fate. It's just that providence had other ideas as to how we would get there. Destiny plans a different route, or turns the dream around, as if it were a riddle, and fulfills the dream in ways we couldn't have expected."

"There is no absurdity so obvious that it cannot be firmly planted in the human head if you only begin to impose it before the age of five, by constantly repeating it with an air of great solemnity"

"The things which the child loves remain in the domain of the heart until old age. The most beautiful thing in life is that our souls remaining over the places where we once enjoyed ourselves"

"The essence of childhood, of course, is play, which my friends and I did endlessly on streets that we reluctantly shared with traffic."

"We have not passed that subtle line between childhood and adulthood until... we have stopped saying "It got lost," and say "I lost it.""

"Creativity is not merely the innocent spontaneity of our youth and childhood; it must also be married to the passion of the adult human being, which is a passion to live beyond one's death."

"When childhood dies, its corpses are called adults and they enter society, one of the politer names of hell. That is why we dread children, even if we love them, they show us the state of our decay."

"All those writers who write about their childhood! Gentle God, if I wrote about mine you wouldn't sit in the same room with me."

" Childhood is that wonderful time of life when all you need to do to lose weight is take a bath."

1. Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers.


2. When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car.


3. If your wife wants to learn to drive, don't stand in her way.


4. Everybody wants to go to heaven; but nobody wants to die.


5. If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.


6. If there is a "WILL", there are 500 relatives.


7. Why is it called 'after dark' when it really is 'after light'?

The highest privilege ever afforded to man is the power of prayer. ...then why don't we pray?
The right to talk to the highest potentate in all the universe... ...
then why don't we pray?
The most powerful force accessible to man is the potential of prayer... ...then why don't we pray?
The greatest longing in the heart of God is to talk to His children... ...
then why don't we pray?
Nothing is impossible to those who pray... ...
then why don't we pray?
No man ever fainted or faltered who gave himself to prayer... ...
then why don't we pray?
Every sin is forgiven, every stain is washed clean, all guilt diminished to the man who prays... ...
then why don't we pray?
Hell moves farther away, satan flees from the man who prays... ...
then why don't we pray?
Anointing will come, mountains will be moved, valleys made smooth, rivers made crossable, the inaccessible made accessible, the impossible made possible, dreams come through to the man who prays... ...then why don't we pray?
God said that men ought always to pray... ...
then why don't we pray?
Paul encouraged prayer without ceasing... ...
then why don't we pray?
The riches of heaven are open to those who pray in His name... ...
then why don't we pray? Everyone can pray, the young, the old, the rich, the poor, the strong, the weak, the child, the aged, the sinner, the prisoner, in any nation, in any language, all can pray... ...
then why don't we pray?

Police Secrite - video powered by Metacafe

According to a news report, a certain private school in Sydney was recently faced with a unique problem .
A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom.
After they put on their lipstick they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints.
Every night the maintenance man would remove them and the next day the girls would put them back.
Finally the principal decided that something had to be done .
She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man.
She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night - ( you can just imagine the yawns from the little princesses).
To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required.
He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it.
Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror ..

Moral to this story:-

There are teachers.... And then there are educators ..

A 92-year-old, petite, well-poised and proud man, who is fully dressed each morning by eight o'clock, with his hair fashionably coifed and shaved perfectly, even though he is legally blind, moved to a nursing home today.

• If you love someone,Set her free...If she comes back, she's yours,If she doesn't, she never was....
  
  THE NEW VERSIONS .....
  
  


• Pessimist:If you love someone,Set her free ...If she ever comes back, she's yours,If she doesn't, as expected, she never was


• Optimist:If you love someone,Set her free ...Don't worry, she will come back.


• Suspicious:If you love someone,Set her free ...If she ever comes back, ask her why.


• Impatient:If you love someone,Set her free ...If she doesn't come back within some time forget her.


• Patient:If you love someone, Set her free ..If she doesn't come back,continue to wait until she comes back ...


• Playful:If you love someone,Set her free ...If she comes back, and if you love her still,set her free again, repeat ...


• C++ Programmer:if(you-love(m_she))m_she.free()if(m_she == NULL)m_she = new CShe;


• Animal-Rights Activist:If you love someone,Set her free,In fact, all living creatures deserve to be free!!


• Lawyers:If you love someone,Set her free,Clause 1a of Paragraph 13a-1 in the SecondAmendment of the Matrimonial Freedom


• Biologist :If you love someone,Set her free,She'll evolve.Statisticians :If you love someone,Set her free,If she loves you, the probability of her comingback is highIf she doesn't, your relation was improbableanyway.


• Schwarzenegger's fans:If you love someone,Set her free,SHE'LL BE BACK!


• Over possessive person :If you love someonedon't set her free.


• MBA :If you love someone set her free instantaneouslyand look for others simultaneouslyPsychologist :If you love someoneset her freeIf she comes back her super ego is dominantIf she doesn't come back her id is supremeIf she doesn't go, she must be crazy.


• Somnabulist :If you love someoneset her freeIf she comes back it's a nightmareIf she doesn't, you must be dreaming.


• ERP functional expert :If you love someoneset her freeIf she comes back, map her into your systemIf she doesn't, carry out a gap-fit analysis


• Finance expert :If you love someoneset her freeIf she comes back, its time to look for fresh loansIf she doesn't, write her off as an asset gone bad.


• Marketing Specialist :If you love someoneset her freeIf she comes back she has brand loyaltyIf she doesn't, reposition the brand in new market


• American President:If you love someoneSet her freeIf she comes back she must be carrying weapons of mass destruction, so attack IraqIf she doesn't, it’s the work of Osama so attack Afghanistan